Columnated Ruins Domino

God Comes to the Hampton Beach Casino

Rob — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 14:50:54 +0000

Somebody’s joy is full, and he looks a lot like me.

Brian Wilson

Hampton Beach, NH
Sun, Jul 13, 2008 08:00 PM

Moving Day

Rob — Wed, 25 Jun 2008 12:21:45 +0000

Finally, the big day is here. Moving into our new condo tomorrow. Up to our throats in boxes, but it will soon be done. While packing and going through old boxes stuffed with papers, I stumbled upon a treasure trove of juvenalia that I will be posting over the next few weeks: truly atrocious poems I wrote in college, some cool poems I wrote in college, a poem I wrote in high school to woo Sara, and sundry other things to take up space whilst I unpacketh.

A Typical Boston Conversation

Rob — Fri, 23 May 2008 15:02:54 +0000

Worker 1: Where do you want to go to lunch?
Worker 2: Susan’s Deli Of Course
Worker 1: Of course? Wow, you are really certain of where you want to eat.
Worker 2: No! That’s the name. Susan’s Deli Of Course
Worker 1: Oh. My. God. That is so funny.
Worker 2: I know! Isn’t it so funny?
Worker 1: It is. Susan’s Deli Of Course. I can’t believe they called it that.
Worker 2: They did! That’s the name.
Worker 1: Funny!
Worker 2: I know. Isn’t it?
Worker 1: I thought you were saying “of course” to imply certainty, but you were just saying the name of the place.
Worker 2: I know! That’s the real name!
Worker 1: Wow, that is something. Really something. Susan’s Deli Of Course.
Worker 2: Of Course is on the sign!
Worker 1: I think I just peed myself with joy.
Worker 2: Of course you did.

My New Hero

Rob — Thu, 22 May 2008 19:14:39 +0000

This guy.

Stuff to Read

Rob — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:18:53 +0000

SF writer and blogger extraordinaire John Scalzi had a contest on his blog Whatever to win an advance copy of his new book Zoe’s Tale (which is set in the universe of his phenomenal Old Man’s War.)

We were tasked with revealing what really happened on August 19, 1994.

I sent two entries and was one of the runner-ups. I won a signed book, so my joy is full. (I got a signed book by Simon Winchester yesterday, so this is the week of people writing on my books. I’m going to see Neil Gaiman speak at M.I.T. on Friday, but I don’t think he is signing any books. I’ll just dream that he did.)

You could call them flash fiction if you want. Microfictions, perhaps. Teensy weensy short stories. Three Sentences in Search of an Author. Hell, you can call them tuna fish sandwiches if it gets you through the day.

Here they are:

Ah, that was the day that, in a fit of pique, Jonas the Alphabet Man struck the letter “K” from our racial memory. He giggled like a schoolgirl for a few minutes. Then he put it back.

That morning my son held his breath and stomped around because we wouldn’t buy him a pony. We tried to get him to breathe, but he was stubborn, just like his dear old dad.
We buried him a few days later.
Then we bought a pony.

(If you feel compelled to tattoo them onto your living flesh, feel free. Creative Commons and self mutilation go hand in hand in my book.)